I hardly managed to get Alex to come with me. I was honestly afraid that he would have gotten in his car and not bothered to follow me back to my house. He could have just left me and not let me tell him what has been happening for so long, and now I stand in my driveway staring at Alex’s fancy car sitting in my filthy driveway infront of this filthy house in a filthy neighborhood.
I watch as he gets out of the car ruffling his bangs a little and percing his lips so his upper lip almost looks like it isn’t there anymore. I’ve only seen Alex like this around my mother. He never made this hard, hidden face around people. Not the fans, not Matt, not anybody I had ever seen before and here I am pulling it out of him.
“Okay,” I sigh as soon as he gets up to me, “Do you want to go inside?”
“Yeah. Lets.” He sighs and motions for me to go ahead of him inside, walking up to the door hesitantly I push it open.
“Hey you guys!” I call, “I’m home and I have a guest!”
“Who?” Maddie peers down the stairs with a huge grin on her face that fades slightly when she recognizes Alex. “Oh. Why?” She raises an eyebrow at me.
“I’m sorry Lex, ignore her.” I smile back at him nervosly to see him with a kind expression on his face.
“Nah it’s okay.” He chuckles, “Where can we talk alone though?” Alex raises a thick eyebrow at me.
“We can go in the dining room, we should be relatively alone in there. Enoughspace to talk for a bit. I don’t think we should go up to my room.” I laugh a bit trying to break the tension.
“Probably not.” He smiles his famous smile at me, though I’m not sure if it’s real.I return the smile and walk ahead of him through the kitchen where we hear a faint music.
“Hey gorgeous.” Sygird smiles widely at me and walks over to give me a hug pausing when he see’s Alex. “Oh. Hello there.” Sygird’s smile fades a bit, his usually soft green eyes hardening.
“You must be Hanna’s new boyfriend.” Alex clenches his jaw, his upper lip dissappearing again.
“You must be Hanna’s ex-boss.” Sygird smiles a bit and holds his hand out for Alex to shake. Alex takes his hand roughly and shakes it.
“Well now that you two are buddys. Sygird is not my boyfriend.” I look up at Alex with a serious expression. He nods.
“Nice to meet you Sygird.” Alex drops his hand, “Where were we going?” He looks down at me and raises his eyebrow impatiently.
“Yeah. This way.” I nod and step aroud Sygird, followed by Alex but I can’t help but notice Sygird bumping Alex’s shoulder. I make my way through the Kitchen into the dining room, where I sit on one of miscilanious chairs sat around the table.
“What did you need to talk to me about?” Alex stands next to a chair leaning on it slightly,
“I want you to know why I left. What happened after I left and I want to know what’s going on with all of my boys.” I sigh letting the ficade drop. Letting my fake smile and happieness fall off letting me show my true feelings through my face.
“So this is going to be a while.” Alex sighs and takes the seat across from me. “Look, Hanna.” He sighs and reaches over taking my hand. “I don’t need to hear about this. I don’t want to know about the.. thing inside of you. Because if I know it’ll weigh on me untill I tell all the guys.”
“Alex.” I groan cutting him off, “The only person I’ve ever had sex with is Matt.” I squeeze his hand, letting that sink in for a moment. “I left you guys because I was scareed of what Matt would do. I was scared of not telling you, I didn’t know what to do and the fact we were mid-way through a tour doesn’t-”
“That’s Matts?” He cutts me back off. His facial expression blank.
“Who else?” I laugh a bit, watching his expression nervously. He sits quietly for a minute thinking through the Math.
“When were you going to tell us?” He asks, searching my eyes for something.
“I wasn’t sure. I thought maybe after it was born.” I look back in his eyes simpithetically. “Whenever I thought about telling you it would never end in a good way.”
“How could it end badly?” He laughs a bit and shakes his head.
“Whoa whats going on here?” I laugh with him slightly taken aback by his reaction.
“You do realize all of us love you?” Alex sighs,
“I don’t know I kinda thought you’d all hate my guts after I left you all like that.” I raise my eyebrows at him,
“You were with us non-stop for almost what? Three weeks. and before that four short but pretty fucking great days.” Alex smiles, “Matt hasn’t been able to have a girlfriend for a long time and when you came along. He was finally really happy. Once you left the tour got really hard. Jack started acting a little weird. Weird as in different. Matt was getting off-track. Disorganized.” He sighs, “Long story short; we all care alot about you. Because of how you kept our team together. There is no way we would reject you for something like this.” I stare at Alex trying to muster up the ability to speak. My stomach turning in knots listening to him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you guys at all.” I take a deep breath leveling my voice. “But I care about you guys too much to drop a baby on all of you. I didn’t want to stress Matt out further then he already was taking care of all of you toddlers.” I laugh a bit.
“You are going to tell him right?” Alex squeezes my hand trying to be comforting.
“Well, I don’t know. I want to.” I sigh and lick my bottom lip thinking, “I’m thinking I just need to wait a bit.” Alex nods,
“I’m okay with that but you have to promise me that you’ll tell him. I’m not sure if I can really have that weighing on my concious for too long of a time.”
“I understand.” I smile at him, “I was scared bringing you here. You looked really pissed.”
“What do you look like to me?” He sighs, “Hanna, for fucks sake you’re way pregnant and I didn’t know with who. It kinda makes you look like you cheated on Matt.”
“I understand that. That’s why I asked you to come here. I figured you needed time to think in your car.” I laugh a bit, “I’m just glad you listened.”
“Always.” He smiles, “Do you know the gender?” I laugh and shake my head a bit, glad to have my friend back.
“No not yet.” I look down at my bloated stomach and run my free hand along the top of it. “I’ve had ultrasounds, but I get nervous looking at them sometimes.” I laugh and shake my head. “Sygird has been going with me for moral support sometimes but. I guess it’s just...”
“Yeah, I know.” He smiles brightly at me. “C’mon. I missed you.” Alex leans in for a hug, which I return gratefully. He stays careful of my baby bump and kisses my cheek.
“Hey Hanna.” I jump a bit and let go of Alex just as Sygird walks in the room with a small smirk on his face.
“Yeah?” I sigh a bit annoyed with him for walking in at the absolute worst time.
“I just need to know what’s going on for dinner tonight. If I need to plan for him?” He nods at Alex.
“I can get my own dinner today.” I nod at him. Sygird stads staring at me for a moment, just looking at me as Alex and I wait for him to leave uncomfortably.
“Alright.” Sygird sighs and walks out of the room.
“That means I probably should leave.” Alex sighs and stands up in his chair.
“You sure?” I frown a bit and stand up with him.
“Yeah.” He smiles and gives me a quick hug. “You should come over sometime.”
“I will.” I grin back at him, “Count on it.”
“I’ll show myself out.” Alex chuckles and starts to head out to the front door before stopping and looking back at me, “And Hanna, respond to my texts this time.”