I close my eyes, my belly bloated from my dinner and my head spinning with thoughts about this baby and Alex. The way were playfully talking earlier, maybe even flirting, felt amazing. It made me feel human. I've felt isolated for so long, fearful of getting hurt. Maybe all I need to do is throw myself in head first. Risk everything on him.

I stand up, inhaling deeply, uncomfortable as my bloated belly causes my tight t-shirt to bulge out slightly.

“Urgh, you're going to be a huge pain in the butt, aren't you, kid?” I sigh, patting my belly affectionately- admiring my body shape from the front and then the side, in the mirror, wearing only Alex's boxers and a tight t-shirt.

“Why don't you let me sleep?” I groan through exhaustion. “Do you want to go and see Alex? Is that it?”

I look at my phone, which reads 2.46am. I would never admit that I need company usually, but seeing as Alex isn't awake to say “I told you so” I creep through to his room and tip-toe to his bed- the room dimly lit with his night light which was only ever on for my benefit.

I climb in slowly, the tired clouding my judgement terribly. I nuzzle Alex's neck from behind and sigh.

“Lex, I need a cuddle, your kid sucks,” I groan, rolling away so we're laid back to back.

He groans tiredly and rolls over, cuddling me from behind. I try to move his hand but fail miserably from tiredness and simply give in with an exhausted huff.

“Leave our baby alone,” Alex mumbles in his sleep rubbing my tiny belly to ease the tension until it's so relaxed I fall asleep.

I wake up the following morning in Alex's grip and gasp, leaping up.

“What the hell happened? What have you done?” I demand, instantly thinking the worst.

“Huh?” Alex yawns, opening his eyes “Oh, you sort of climbed into my bed complaining about the baby and I rubbed the knots out of your tummy and you fell asleep, that's all.”

Alex sits up, rubbing his eyes and stretching as he sits on the edge of his bed.

“Promise?” I ask, nervously, feeling comforted that he didn't try anything and actually helped me even when I was vulnerable.

“Promise,” he assures, standing up, staying his distance from me.

“Then come here and give me a morning kiss,” I blush “No tongues.”

Alex steps forward in only his boxers, pressing his lips to mine softly- our bodies naturally coming together without force.

He pulls away after a few seconds and looks at my little bump “It's definitely getting bigger.”

I shrug, still not totally comfortable with the whole situation.

“Lex, I don't want to ruin this baby's life. I'd love to have the ideal family. You, me and baby. A little baby who looked nothing like the biological dad, but knowing my luck it will. I'll fuck up and we'll go our seperate ways. You won't care about the baby and I'll be left with a baby I can't love. It's like history repeating itself. My mom was 14 when she had me and dad talked her out of an abortion. She wasn't ready. She never loved me...”

“Anna, you don't need to worry. Even if nothing ever happens romantically you're my best friend in the whole world and I'll always be there. A baby will ruin nothing. I'll be supportive of you, which is what your mom never had. Plus we have a huge extended network of family and friends to help out. We will love this baby,” Alex assures, tapping my bump lovingly.

“We'll see,” I sigh, kissing his lips again, quickly. “I just can't make the same mistakes as them.”

“We won't. This kid will be so lucky. We can give it what you never had,” Alex mumbles into my hair, leaving his neck exposed right next to my neck.

I suck on it gently, leaving a slight mark.

“Mm, suck it harder,” he mock dirty-talks me.

“You're a dick,” I groan, pulling away and pecking his lips. “We need to tell your mom and dad...”

“Great...” Alex rolls his eyes.

“Will they be mad?” I whimper, my stomach suddenly sinking with nerves.

“Not mad, as such...” Alex shrugs, putting his arm around me. “Just disappointed.”

“Disappointed? That's even worse... That mean I've let them down. After everything you and your family have done...” I whimper.

“No, baby, it's okay. They'll say they're disappointed because we're A+ grade students and a child will stop us going to college. We say it won't. Mom has a mood swing, goes out and comes back with baby clothes and is back to being happy. That's how my family work,” Alex assures, kissing my temple.

I bite my lip as we get our usual Friday morning wake up call from Isobel and the smell of out Friday morning pancakes wafting around in the air.

Notes

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-All Time Lily