Dreaming With A Broken Heart

Dash flipped onto her back, pushing her hair out of her face and kicked the tangled blankets away from her legs. The sun was just starting to creep through her window, bathing her room in a soft blue light. She let out a deep sigh, sitting up and glancing around her messy room. She had left Alex alone in the kitchen the night before and had locked herself in her room. A few minutes later, she heard Alex's footsteps on the stairs and then go into his bedroom. The house had been quiet since.

Slipping out of bed, Dash picked her guitar and notebook off of the floor before returning to her mattress. She didn't know what to say to Alex when she would see him, but Dash knew that she would have to say something. She knew that they couldn't leave the air between them so tangled and confusing.

Dash began plucking at the strings of her guitar, trying to push Alex out of her mind. She focused on the feeling of the strings beneath her fingertips, listened to the quiet melody that she was creating. She closed her eyes as she felt the vibration of the guitar on her lap. She began humming under her breath, already forming words to lay with music in her head.

Try as she might, Dash could not stop thinking about the exchange between her and Alex down in the kitchen. The air between them had been so intense, so electric. It had taken every ounce of her willpower to tear herself away from the boy. But Alex was her friend, she reasoned, Alex had been a huge factor in her getting over the break up with Sam.

She had been unable to sleep for the entire night. Every time she closed her eyes, she could feel Alex touching her; she could feel his hands on her body, his breath on her lips. Dash shook her head, forcing the memory of the night before from her head. She had to do something to fix it all.

Pushing herself out of bed, Dash crossed her room and sneaked out into the hallway, tiptoeing over to Alex's closed bedroom door. She took a deep breath before knocking softly. Opening the door, she stuck her head inside. “Alex?”

She found Alex sitting up in his bed, a book on his lap. “Guess I'm not the only one who couldn't sleep,” he said, offering her a crooked smile.

Dash slipped inside and closed the door behind her. “I guess not.” She crossed her arms, hovering by the door.

“You can come closer, you know.” Alex closed his book and looked up at Dash. “I'm not going to bite.”

Sighing, Dash crossed the room, sitting next to Alex. She kept her focus on her tangled hands as she murmured, “so, about last night...”

Alex turned his body so that he was facing the small girl sitting next to him. “Hey,” he said, reaching out to lift her chin, forcing her to make eye contact with him. “I shouldn't have done that. Any of that. Messing everything up like that-”

“No, Alex, wait,” she interrupted. “I just need to get this out. Last night, I didn't stop you. And I wanted what was happening just as badly as you did. I did. And I couldn't sleep because I was up all night thinking about it. Thinking about you.” She closed her eyes and blew out a breath. “That would've changed everything, Alex. And I don't want that.” Dash reached across the space between them and rested her hand on Alex's thigh. “I love how it is between us, how things are now, and I don't want anything to screw that up.”

Dash bit her lip and retracted her hand, waiting for some sort of reaction from the brunette sitting next to her. She released a breath that she hadn't realized that she was holding. It had always been easier for Dash to keep her emotions to herself. She hated for people to think of her as emotional, or weak; for her, those words were two in the same.

“Dash,” Alex finally said, his voice low and husky. “I get it. And you're right. Your friendship means a lot to me. We shouldn't fuck it up.”

She smiled, relieved that they were on the same page. “Can we just forget this last week? Just forget all the awkwardness?”

“Definitely,” Alex agreed, returning her smile. They sat on the bed side-by-side for another moment, before Dash rose to her feet.

“I'm going to head downstairs,” she told him. “Do some writing. I think I'm close to finishing another song.”

“That's awesome!” Alex responded with genuine interest. “This EP you're working on is going to be great, Dash. I have no doubt about that.”

“Thanks, Alex.”

×××
She was buzzing with excitement. Her hands shook as she slipped the warm CD into its case, a broad smile forming at her lips. It took all her self control not to squeal in her euphoria. She dashed out of the basement, taking the stairs two at a time, eager to tell everyone the news. Most of the boys were in the kitchen; Baz was hovering near the kitchen sink as he carefully watch Chuck cutting raw chicken into pieces for supper. Ezra and Kane were sitting at the table, mindlessly entertaining themselves.

Dash took a breath and sat down at the kitchen table, across from her band-mates. Ezra looked up from his crossword puzzle, his eyebrows raised. “What's up?”

Reaching into her bag, she pulled out the CD and pushed it across the table. Kane and Ezra leaned together to look at the front of the album. “It's done. We finished it. Pierre and I finished putting the last song together this afternoon.”

Kane's eyes lit up immediately. Chuck and Sébastien abandoned their food preparation to crowd the table. “Let me see!” Baz reached around the crowded table, picking up the rough album.

“So this is it,” Kane murmured as Dash smiled across the table at him. “It's finally done? You're ready for people to hear this? Ready for it to be out in the world?”

“Yes,” Dash confirmed, her eyes shining with pride. “It's everything I hoped that it would be. It's perfect.

With a brilliant mind and a filthy mouth:
starring Holding on for Hope
Scene I: Your sweater was hideous.
Scene II: Your breath on my lips is the prelude to every kiss.
Scene III: The darkest days and the darker nights.
Scene IV: Plastic hearts with shaky foundations.
Scene V: Like we were the answer.
“You finished it?”

Dash looked up to see Alex standing on the outskirts of the group with a small smile on his face. She returned his smile, giving him a small nod. “It's done.” She slipped the CD out of her cousin's hands and passed it to Alex. “It's all done.”

“Looks good,” he replied, nodding his head. “Can we listen?”

“Of course!' Dash jumped up from her chair, taking the album from Alex and slipping into the portable CD player on the counter. Each person in the kitchen immediately quieted down as the sound of Kane playing the guitar filled the kitchen.

After listening to the first song, Alex leaned over, nudging Dash with his elbow. “You did good, McCafferty.”

“We did good, Alex. I couldn't have done this without everyone. Without Pierre. Without you.” She smiled up at him, nudging him back. “I'm really going to miss you guys.”

He pulled his eyebrows together in confusion at Dash's words. “What do you mean?”

Dash shrugged, keeping her eyes down. “The album is done. That was the whole reason that I came out here. Now it's done. I'm going to have to get back to real life. Back to the band.” She let out a soft sigh and rested her head on her hand. “I can't hide out here forever.”

Alex chewed the inside of his mouth as he mulled over Dash's words. The last month he had spent in the Simple Plan house with the guys and with Dash had been enjoyable for him. Getting to know Dash had been the highlight. He was sure that he had made a friend in her.

“When do you think you'll leave?” he managed to ask her, his voice soft.

She bit her lip, glancing over at Alex. “Kane and Ezra are going to head out tomorrow night. You know, take the album back to everyone else.”

“And you?”

“I fly out Thursday morning.”

“That soon?” Alex asked, immediately. Thursday was only two days away. “Jeez, you don't waste any time, do you, McCafferty?”

She didn't answer, instead reached across the space between them to weave her fingers through Alex's. “You'll be fine,” was all she said, before squeezing Alex's hand and leaving the room.

Notes

& now i'm free to go,
but time cannot remove
the only life i know;
only time will prove.

I'm getting so much better with updating, don't you all agree? Leave a comment this time, yeah? xo