Damned if I do ya
ch. 10
Alex’s POV
“I still think you should tell her the truth Lex, it’s not good to lie to a girl you barely know,” Jack said in a concerned voice. I rolled my eyes at him. Of course he was right, he was so right. But at this moment, I didn’t give two shits. I finally had a chance to get to the source of Chloe’s cold heart. I needed to figure out why she was so hesitant to trust people. I could get a glimpse into her heart finally and I wasn’t going to let some silly little white lie get in the way of fixing this girl.
I shoved Jack playfully as I chuckled. “Shut up man, you know I hate it when you’re right.”
“Why are you even doing this Alex? I don’t get it. Are you really over Lisa that quickly?” Jack’s brown eyes stared at me curiously. I sighed loudly, twiddling my thumbs in my lap, staring at the ground as if my carpet became the most interesting thing in the entire world. I didn’t know when exactly I had stopped loving Lisa, it just sort of…happened. One day I fell asleep in love with her and then I woke up completely disgusted to be with her.
I sighed again as I looked into Jack’s eyes seriously, “I stopped loving her a long time ago Jack. I mean, half of the songs on our last album were about her infidelities. I don’t know why I stuck around for so long. I guess…I guess—“
“You just didn’t know how else to be?” Jack offered, cutting me off. I nodded. It was true; I didn’t know how to be without Lisa. She had been in my life so long I forgot who I was before I met her, who I was without her. I lost myself being with her. For the first time I didn’t know who or what I was anymore. Usually I can figure out who I am deep inside but this time around I didn’t know up from down, left from right. I was stuck in a fucking rut and Chloe was my secondhand pick-me-up. She was gonna be the one to save me. I just knew it somehow. Something about this girl gave me a new sort of feeling. She made me feel…right. Like I belonged in her life. That’s when I decided to give her a quick call.
Jack walked into the kitchen to make some food. I grabbed my phone from the coffee table and just as I was about to dial Chloe’s number, her contact lit up my screen. I made a mental note to ask for a picture of her for her contact. I tapped the green button and held the phone to my ear.
“Hey gorgeous I was just about to—“ I stopped talking when I heard loud screaming and muffled shouts. I pressed the phone closer to my ear, trying to hear every word.
“Get off me Luke…Noooo!” I heard Chloe scream. A chill ran through my body when I heard a sickening thump and a man grunt in exhaustion.
The man spoke in a mature voice, “Listen bitch, try to run from me one more time and you’ll regret it.” I heard a clinking of metal as I heard a soft whimper close to the phone.
“Help me Alex,” Chloe choked out before the line went dead.
I didn’t waste any time. I shouted out to Jack to lock up when he left. I grabbed my keys and hastily turned on my car, swerving it out of the drive-way and speeding down the street towards Chloe’s street. Car horns blared at me, people stuck their middle fingers at me. A slew of curse words were thrown in my direction but that did little to slow me down. I made it to her apartment building in record time. I knew where she lived because I dropped her off when she got out of the hospital. She didn’t invite me in but from the outside it looked pretty cozy. I parked in the parking space beside her car, thankful that it was still empty at this time.
I ran up the flight of stairs as fast as I could, taking two steps at a time. My heart beat fast in my chest, my ears rung with the rushing of the blood pumping in my veins. I was short of breath by the time I reached her apartment but I still didn’t slow down. I shoved against the door to find that it wasn’t locked like I thought it’d be. My mind whirled with a thousand questions as I saw the room unscathed, the whole apartment was eerily quiet. That was when I heard it. A soft moan. I creeped closer to the bedroom door. I peeked around it and was horrified at the site before me.
Chloe was sprawled across the bed, her face buried in the pillows. A man about twice her age sat between her legs, gripping her hips in his wrinkled hands. They were both completely nude. Chloe had a restraint on her hands and mouth. She lifted her head up and saw me standing in the doorway.
She screamed around the gag which caused the man to turn towards my direction. One look at me and he sprung from the bed in a rage.
“Who the fuck are you?” he screamed as he shoved me to the floor. Chloe kept screaming around her gag, tears sprung from her eyes.
I stood up and tackled the naked man before me, not even caring that I was tackling a fucking naked man. I punched him in the face and rammed my knee into his groin. He let out a cry of pain and rolled from on top of me. I shot up and went to free Chloe. I wrapped her in a sheet before removing her gag.
“Chloe, baby it’s okay I’m here. I’ve got you shh,” I kept cooing in her ear, trying to calm her sobs before I lifted her into my arms. She cried out in pain and I felt so bad but I needed to get her out.
I started towards the door when she started thrashing around in my arms, “LET ME GO NO PLEASE STOP LET ME GO!” Her dull green eyes became animated and wild. I held her tighter in my arms. She was just freaking out I thought. But she kept thrashing around like a fish out of water.
“Chloe what the fuck I have to get you out of here!” I half yelled at her. She was beginning to pant and gasp. Her eyes widened with fear, her lips paled.
“Can’t. Breathe,” she choked on her words. I headed towards my car, running as fast as I could. Once I got her and I in the backseat of my car I locked the doors and held her in my arms. I rocked her back and forth, pressing her body close to mine, trying to calm her down. I knew from experience what exactly what was happening. She was having an anxiety attack. I had no idea what to do so I begged, prayed for her to give me a little hint. I buried my face in the crook of her neck, kissing it so I could feel her pulse. It was going way too fast and my frustration peaked and I started crying into her neck. Her body began to shake and my arms were beginning to fail me. I didn’t think I could keep her together much longer.
“Chloe please tell me how to make you feel better,” I sobbed. I didn’t know how much time we had before that guy came out of her apartment.
“S—sing s—ing,” she gasped as her body convulsed again. I racked my brain for a song that would soothe her. Suddenly I forgot every word to every song I had ever memorized. My mind was just blank. I was too freaked. But before I knew it, the words of a song fell from my lips.
Lazy lover
Find a place for me again
You felt it once before
I know you did
I could see it
Whiskey Princess
Drink me under, pull me in
You had me at come over boy
I need a friend
I understand
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
You take me over
I throw you up against the wall
We've seen it all before
But this one's different
It's deliberate
You send me reeling
Calling out to you for more
The value of this moment lives in metaphor
Yeah, through it all
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh, aren't you sick of sleeping alone?
We're salty on a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
(Oh god I'm sick of sleeping alone)
Immediately her heartbeat slowed, her body stopped shaking and her breathing became less frantic. I don’t know what made me do it, maybe it was the song I just wrote off the top of my head but I leaned forward and pressed my lips on hers.
Her breath hitched but she sighed on my lips. I took that as my chance to slowly slip my tongue inside her mouth. Our breath twined together in their own melody. Her hand clenched around my hair as I ran my fingers softly against her face. The amount of pure emotion flooded the car, fogging up the windows. I held her close to my body. My body felt like it was on fire but I wasn’t burning. No, I was…glowing. Chloe’s kiss made fireworks appear in around me. I felt her smile as she pulled away. I looked into her eyes and for the first time since I’ve met her, I saw something in her eyes.
A twinkle of hope.
“I still think you should tell her the truth Lex, it’s not good to lie to a girl you barely know,” Jack said in a concerned voice. I rolled my eyes at him. Of course he was right, he was so right. But at this moment, I didn’t give two shits. I finally had a chance to get to the source of Chloe’s cold heart. I needed to figure out why she was so hesitant to trust people. I could get a glimpse into her heart finally and I wasn’t going to let some silly little white lie get in the way of fixing this girl.
I shoved Jack playfully as I chuckled. “Shut up man, you know I hate it when you’re right.”
“Why are you even doing this Alex? I don’t get it. Are you really over Lisa that quickly?” Jack’s brown eyes stared at me curiously. I sighed loudly, twiddling my thumbs in my lap, staring at the ground as if my carpet became the most interesting thing in the entire world. I didn’t know when exactly I had stopped loving Lisa, it just sort of…happened. One day I fell asleep in love with her and then I woke up completely disgusted to be with her.
I sighed again as I looked into Jack’s eyes seriously, “I stopped loving her a long time ago Jack. I mean, half of the songs on our last album were about her infidelities. I don’t know why I stuck around for so long. I guess…I guess—“
“You just didn’t know how else to be?” Jack offered, cutting me off. I nodded. It was true; I didn’t know how to be without Lisa. She had been in my life so long I forgot who I was before I met her, who I was without her. I lost myself being with her. For the first time I didn’t know who or what I was anymore. Usually I can figure out who I am deep inside but this time around I didn’t know up from down, left from right. I was stuck in a fucking rut and Chloe was my secondhand pick-me-up. She was gonna be the one to save me. I just knew it somehow. Something about this girl gave me a new sort of feeling. She made me feel…right. Like I belonged in her life. That’s when I decided to give her a quick call.
Jack walked into the kitchen to make some food. I grabbed my phone from the coffee table and just as I was about to dial Chloe’s number, her contact lit up my screen. I made a mental note to ask for a picture of her for her contact. I tapped the green button and held the phone to my ear.
“Hey gorgeous I was just about to—“ I stopped talking when I heard loud screaming and muffled shouts. I pressed the phone closer to my ear, trying to hear every word.
“Get off me Luke…Noooo!” I heard Chloe scream. A chill ran through my body when I heard a sickening thump and a man grunt in exhaustion.
The man spoke in a mature voice, “Listen bitch, try to run from me one more time and you’ll regret it.” I heard a clinking of metal as I heard a soft whimper close to the phone.
“Help me Alex,” Chloe choked out before the line went dead.
I didn’t waste any time. I shouted out to Jack to lock up when he left. I grabbed my keys and hastily turned on my car, swerving it out of the drive-way and speeding down the street towards Chloe’s street. Car horns blared at me, people stuck their middle fingers at me. A slew of curse words were thrown in my direction but that did little to slow me down. I made it to her apartment building in record time. I knew where she lived because I dropped her off when she got out of the hospital. She didn’t invite me in but from the outside it looked pretty cozy. I parked in the parking space beside her car, thankful that it was still empty at this time.
I ran up the flight of stairs as fast as I could, taking two steps at a time. My heart beat fast in my chest, my ears rung with the rushing of the blood pumping in my veins. I was short of breath by the time I reached her apartment but I still didn’t slow down. I shoved against the door to find that it wasn’t locked like I thought it’d be. My mind whirled with a thousand questions as I saw the room unscathed, the whole apartment was eerily quiet. That was when I heard it. A soft moan. I creeped closer to the bedroom door. I peeked around it and was horrified at the site before me.
Chloe was sprawled across the bed, her face buried in the pillows. A man about twice her age sat between her legs, gripping her hips in his wrinkled hands. They were both completely nude. Chloe had a restraint on her hands and mouth. She lifted her head up and saw me standing in the doorway.
She screamed around the gag which caused the man to turn towards my direction. One look at me and he sprung from the bed in a rage.
“Who the fuck are you?” he screamed as he shoved me to the floor. Chloe kept screaming around her gag, tears sprung from her eyes.
I stood up and tackled the naked man before me, not even caring that I was tackling a fucking naked man. I punched him in the face and rammed my knee into his groin. He let out a cry of pain and rolled from on top of me. I shot up and went to free Chloe. I wrapped her in a sheet before removing her gag.
“Chloe, baby it’s okay I’m here. I’ve got you shh,” I kept cooing in her ear, trying to calm her sobs before I lifted her into my arms. She cried out in pain and I felt so bad but I needed to get her out.
I started towards the door when she started thrashing around in my arms, “LET ME GO NO PLEASE STOP LET ME GO!” Her dull green eyes became animated and wild. I held her tighter in my arms. She was just freaking out I thought. But she kept thrashing around like a fish out of water.
“Chloe what the fuck I have to get you out of here!” I half yelled at her. She was beginning to pant and gasp. Her eyes widened with fear, her lips paled.
“Can’t. Breathe,” she choked on her words. I headed towards my car, running as fast as I could. Once I got her and I in the backseat of my car I locked the doors and held her in my arms. I rocked her back and forth, pressing her body close to mine, trying to calm her down. I knew from experience what exactly what was happening. She was having an anxiety attack. I had no idea what to do so I begged, prayed for her to give me a little hint. I buried my face in the crook of her neck, kissing it so I could feel her pulse. It was going way too fast and my frustration peaked and I started crying into her neck. Her body began to shake and my arms were beginning to fail me. I didn’t think I could keep her together much longer.
“Chloe please tell me how to make you feel better,” I sobbed. I didn’t know how much time we had before that guy came out of her apartment.
“S—sing s—ing,” she gasped as her body convulsed again. I racked my brain for a song that would soothe her. Suddenly I forgot every word to every song I had ever memorized. My mind was just blank. I was too freaked. But before I knew it, the words of a song fell from my lips.
Lazy lover
Find a place for me again
You felt it once before
I know you did
I could see it
Whiskey Princess
Drink me under, pull me in
You had me at come over boy
I need a friend
I understand
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
You take me over
I throw you up against the wall
We've seen it all before
But this one's different
It's deliberate
You send me reeling
Calling out to you for more
The value of this moment lives in metaphor
Yeah, through it all
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Dizzy hurricane
Oh god, I'm sick of sleeping alone
You're salty like a summer day
Kiss the sweat away
To your radio
Backseat serenade
Little hand grenade
Oh, aren't you sick of sleeping alone?
We're salty on a summer day
Kiss the pain away
To your radio
(Oh god I'm sick of sleeping alone)
Immediately her heartbeat slowed, her body stopped shaking and her breathing became less frantic. I don’t know what made me do it, maybe it was the song I just wrote off the top of my head but I leaned forward and pressed my lips on hers.
Her breath hitched but she sighed on my lips. I took that as my chance to slowly slip my tongue inside her mouth. Our breath twined together in their own melody. Her hand clenched around my hair as I ran my fingers softly against her face. The amount of pure emotion flooded the car, fogging up the windows. I held her close to my body. My body felt like it was on fire but I wasn’t burning. No, I was…glowing. Chloe’s kiss made fireworks appear in around me. I felt her smile as she pulled away. I looked into her eyes and for the first time since I’ve met her, I saw something in her eyes.
A twinkle of hope.
Awe thank you! I appreciate that<3
10/23/13