I wake up a pounding in my ear. I frown a little. I’m in my own bed? I don’t remember getting here honestly. I didn’t eat hardly anything yesterday. I wanted to get wasted. You can’t blame me. I reach down to my pocket and pull out my phone.

To: Rian
Hey, What happened last night?

I send the messege and close my shitty flip phone before throwing it across the bad. I close my eyes and throw myself back on my bed praying that sleep will find me.
I give up. It feels like its been hours. I walk down into my kitchen and start brewing a cup of coffee.
“What the fuck man!” I jump and clutch my ears as Jack runs into my house shouting.
“What?” I groan and close my eyes when I feel his fist make contact with my arm.
“You’re GAY!?” He almost shouts again. My heart stops in my chest as I look up at him.
“Ahem what?” all of a sudden it feels like my mouth went dry. Jack pushes my arm.
“Dude. Rian came over to my house this morning flipping shit.” Jack chuckles.
“What? Why?”
“I don’t know you should talk to him.” Jack grins. “I got to go. My mom is in the car waiting for me outside. Bye.” He chuckles at me and turns to run out the door. Leaving me standing in the middle of my kitchen afraid.

This is going to be the end of my life. Rian is going to tell everyone I’m gay. Erik is going to go after me. I’m going to have to deal with people calling me Gay or a Faggot.
I’m not ready for this. Any of this.

-School-

I can feel the bags under my eyes on my face. I hardly slept last night dreading school today. Rian already told Jack, who else?
“Hey baby!” Lisa runs up to me with a huge smile on her face.
“Hey Lisa.” I groan and hold an arm out to hug her back.
“You okay sweetheart?” Lisa frowns and reaches up running a hand through my hair.
“I’m fine.” I sigh and look down at her, “I just need to figure something out with Rian.”
“Friend drama?” A small smirk spreads across her face, “If you need to talk to somebody you know I’m here for you.” I nod at her,
“Look, Lisa I’m going to see if I can find him. I’ll catch you later.” Lisa frowns as I walk away from her down the hall in the direction of Rian’s locker. He stands pulling his things out, piling them into his arms.
“Rian!” I call to him. He looks over at me then turns, slamming his locker before starting in the opposite direction hurriedly. “WAIT!” I call after him and start to run after him.
Fuck. Come on. Even if he doesn’t want to be with me, Jack needs us both. I need them both. We’re finally getting this a band thing together. I grab Rians shoulder.
“Dude what’s going on?” I demand.
“I gotta get to class.” Rian snaps at me then looks at me apologetically. “I’m sorry. I just. Can’t talk now…” I let go of his shoulder and watch him jog off to his next class.
My chest starts to tighten up. Fuck I can’t do this now. Not now. Not here. Come on Alex calm the fuck down. You don’t need to panic in the middle of the hallway
“AAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH” I let out a scream. I hate life.

Notes

Hey you guys. I know this is a short chapter. Sorry <3
Rae.Barakitten.




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