Nikki

I was utterly content with my relationship with Alex.

The way we got together was just...so smooth. Being around him, I forgot nearly everything. Even though, at that point, we had been dating for only three weeks. He just made me happy.

It was almost time for things to end, however. To go back home to Wisconsin and begin readying myself for tour. I was excited for that, as well. To get back on the road and do what I absolutely loved most: play music.

I wasn't the kind of person that did what I did because I needed money. I did it purely for the love of the music, and the love of our fans.

I remembered this one guy I met who was about a foot taller than me and had a single tattoo on his left side, saying, "This is Where I Depart". A lyric of ours. Whenever I heard that song or performed it, I imagined that kid in my mind.

But he had come up to me, his We Came As Romans tanktop covered in sweat in the front and back, his skinny jeans crinkled up around his ankles, his blue Vans dirtied and scuffed up.

He was good looking. I wouldn't deny that. Not as good looking as my boy Alex, but he was up there. Longer black hair, a septum piercing, a lip piercing. Blue eyes.

He came up to me, smiled, and said, "Hi, Nikki!"

I smiled right back and cocked my head. I was fascinated by him. He seemed like he belonged in a story on Tumblr. Never once did I think we'd have fans that seemed to happy and pleased to see us.

"Hello!" I laughed. "Who are you?"

"I'm Tyler," he said. "And I wanted to show you this."

He turned to the side and ran his finger down the beautiful script that was his tattoo. I could feel my jaw dropping and I leaned in closer to it, rested my hand on it.

"Oh my God, that's fucking amazing," I whispered. "I honestly have no words."

Tyler looked overjoyed. He was so happy. It was evident in his eyes.

"Thank you," he said. "I was hoping you'd like it. Anyway," he dropped his draw-string backpack from his shoulders and dug out a small, folded piece of notebook paper. "This is for you. Read it later, please, but I just want to make sure that you got it."

"I will read it, I promise," I said, taking it between my fingers. "Thank you, I love getting letters. So much."

Tyler smiled. He bit his lip. He was also nervous.

"Can I please have a hug?" he finally asked, his voice trembling. I laughed and ran a hand through my hair, and stepped towards him.

"Of course you can," I whispered as he leaned down and wrapped his arms around me.

"Thank you so much," Tyler murmured in my ear when we made contact. "I lost my mom as well last year. And the fact that you've been so strong just inspires me."

I buried my head in his neck. "It's all for you, Tyler."

When he pulled away, he looked at his feet.

"Is it okay if I get a picture as well?" he asked, again sounding unnecessarily nervous. I nodded and pulled myself next to him as he lifted his phone into the air. He draped his arm over my shoulder and I made a face, as I held his hand.

"I promise I'll read the letter," I said. "Thank you for coming today."

Tyler nodded. "Thank you," he said, and kissed my cheek. Then he left.

He was the first fan experience I'd had where I could feel that I had truly impacted someone's life. It was a little before Warped, in January. The room the meet and greet happened was hot. I was a warm, sweaty mess as well. But it was okay.

I loved my life. I loved everything in it. My band mates, our fans, my boyfriend (He also appeared to be my bestfriend right then and there. We had grown that close, physically and emotionally in just three weeks. Never before were two people meant to be together).

I loved life. I was happy. I was so, so, happy. And I couldn't wait to get back home to it all.

I was also ready to show Alex around Wisconsin for the three days he'd be staying at our house. Austin said he didn't mind. I didn't mind. Alex didn't mind. I was bringing my other half along with me.

I thought of Tyler as I folded another t-shirt into my suitcase.

Austin

The knife block on the corner of the counter. It stuck out to me like a blazing bush.

["This is where the fun starts," the boy whispers to the wall, "This is really where the fun begins."]

"Where, or where, do the lovebirds resdie?" I growled to myself.

"In the nest, of course," I continued. "Where else? Their love nest. Their love -- nest. Love nest. Funny words." I laughed at myself. I groaned and cracked my neck.

"Where, or where, do the lovebird die?" I wondered aloud. I would find the answer soon enough. Because I would witness the death of a love right before my eyes. The beautiful, swan song ending.

Beautiful for me, anyway. So pretty. Wonderous.

I was sitting on the kitchen floor, facing the glittering knife block. I hoisted myself to my feet and reached for the largest knife.

It shined like the moon on water. So perfect.

My sweatshirt was much too small to conceal such a pretty gift. Only I could appreciate its true beauty.

"Oh, cutsie, wootsie," I sang, "not so cute anymore, are we?"

My mind was spinning. I had to go to the airport in twenty minutes to pick up the Whore and her slave, Alex.

"Oh, short change of plans, Austin!" I shouted. "My fucking boyfriend is going to stay with us for a few days, Austin, okay? If you're not okay with that, then he won't. You cool, Austin?! You cool?!"

I threw the knife at the wall. It jabbed it, for a moment, then slid down and clattered on the floor.

"Your face," I whispered. "That was your face."

I picked up the knife again and cleaned the dust from drywall off the metal.

"Sorry, baby," I whispered. "I'll makes ure that you don't get hurt again."

I kissed the blade. I kissed the fucking blade.

Alex

As we stepped into the airport, I grabbed Nikki's hand. I hadn't spent any actual leisure time in Wisconsin before, and it was cold. Maryland was chilly as well, but Wisconsin was cold.

Nikki's hand, however, was warm against mine. And that was reassuring.

Her bare arm brushed against mine. I smiled and kissed her cheek. I picked up my backpack and slung it around my shoulders, kept walking. I grabbed her hand once again.

"It's so weird that you're with me, here," Nikki murmured. "I'm happy. I really love this."

I smiled. "I'm glad too," I said. "Really glad."

We made our way to the baggage claim. There, I accidentally picked up the wrong bags twice, the first time to a grumpy old man, the second time to a grumpy single mom. Or so I assumed. She acted like it.

I felt horrible when I didn't get our bags right the first time. I was only trying to make a good impression on Nikki, and I was failing miserably.

When I finally did get the right bags, however, she just laughed, kissed me on the cheek, and took hers; we began to walk.

Outside, the sun shone down brightly. Not a cloud was in the sky.

In that moment, she was flawless. I knew nobody was perfect, but she just looked like it right then and there. I didn't know why. To this day, I can't explain it to myself.

"I'll just tell Austin we're outside," she said. Nikki began dialing the number, the number that had texted me such a strange message.

I stared at her. I couldn't take my eyes away from her. Her sparkling eyes. Her shiny, brown hair. Curly hair. I tossed a few of her curls as she talked on the phone.

And then we waited.

I kissed her on the lips before our ride came forward. It was a good, healthy kiss. The last kiss I ever got from Nikki.

I didn't know what really happened next. I remember Austin pulling up, staggering out of the car, and just watching us as we came forward. His shoulders were slumped, his head was hung low, and he was wearing a black sweatshirt with the hood up. He didn't look pleased to see his best friend home, at all.

I realize now it was me. It was all my fault.

When Nikki came within grabbing distance, Austin pulled her to him, and she screamed. I shoved him away from her, and slammed him against the car. Nikki fell back to her butt and began crying. I didn't realize why she was so upset, when I saw what was in Austin's hand.

It was a knife. A bloody knife.

He dropped it. I could feel tears rising in my eyes and I turned back to Nikki. She was on the ground, gasping, clutching her abdoment. I didn't know which way to go. If I let go of Austin, he would probably run. But Nikki needed me.

So I screamed.

"HELP! HELP!"

I could feel Austin squirming beneath my hands. I punched him and he tried to punch back, but I threw him to the ground.

"Don't you fucking move, Austin, or I swear to God I'll--"

"What?!" he spat. "Kill me?! That was my intention anyway! I was going to kill myself, asshole!"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I shook my head, eyes narrowed.

"Why?"

Nikki was still crying beside me. I looked over. Our eyes met, and she bit her lip.

"If I can't have her," Austin pointed at my wounded lover, curled up on the ground and bleeding. "Then no one can."

That was when the security guards pulled me off him. And when I took Nikki's hand in mine.